Being: Conscious, mortal existence; life.
Every month we welcome two families, two people, two voices to share their stories in whatever way they choose. We hope that you find joy in their daily lives, and their simple habit of just being.
In a short phone conversation, Truman, my son said to me, “I’m mad at you. Mommy, you didn’t listen to me when I told you NOT to go away.”
I had just put my swim suit on when the phone rang. My mother in law said that Truman was upset. But in that moment, I wanted to pull him into my lap and explain how much Mommy and Daddy need time away sometimes. But, my husband and I are 6 hours away on our yearly weekend getaway with 14 of our friends. We made a pact years ago before kids that we would continue to cultivate our relationships and our marriages every year.
There was no deep explanation to Truman. In fact, after a few seconds on speaker phone with him. He had walked away, I guess he had said what he was feeling and there wasn’t more to say. My sweet Mother in Law assured us that he would be fine, but I felt a twinge of guilt. I want him to feel listened to. And when I get home, I hope he will see that this time we spend away from him brings us back refreshed, relieved and ready to love him better than when we left. And I remember that when I feel that mother guilt creeping up. I am a better mother by floating on a lake with my girl friends, playing a rousing game of kickball, reading books, painting my toenails and spending lots of time with my husband.
My friend (a writing professor) asked me what I was writing about and after I explained what I wanted to say he exclaimed “just write this ‘I feel guilty when I relax and it’s stupid.’ ” And he’s exactly right. But little by little, I’m learning. And how does one learn how to do anything without practice?
I believe that taking time for your spouse is essential. To remember why they are in love– recharging, connecting, playing. They will most likely come home and be better parents.
And I’m training Truman to be a husband now. And if I can teach him how to take time for his marriage, with our own marriage. One day he’ll understand that I did listen to him. And I chose to be a better mommy.
Do you take trips with your spouse? How do you cultivate your relationships to become a better parent and a spouse?
We hope you will join us in welcoming Mary to the blog during this month of June! Mary will be here each Wednesday to share her photographs and reflections with us. You can read more about Mary’s life as an art director and parent on her own blog The Yellow Door Paperie.
Rhythm of the Home is an online magazine for families that focuses on creating with children, nature explorations, seasonal celebrations, conscious parenting, and mindfulness in all that we do. To learn more about us, please visit us on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter.
We welcome new submissions for our upcoming seasons. To learn more about submitting, please visit our magazine.